Singing along with the radio to Rihanna's "S&M" this morning, I drove past Chester's Ancient Burial Ground and felt really weird. How do you think these 1600s ladies and gentlemen would feel if they knew someone was speeding past in a Dodge Ram, belting out, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but chains and whips excite me? Nana nana nana come on!"
What has the world come to?
Sorry, great-great-great-great grandparents.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Nail Salon People-Watching
There are 3 types of people who go to nail salons:
1) Those who have been given gift certificates or some amount of money to spend on themselves, and have decided to give themselves a treat; just a little pampering for a day.
2) Those who have a prom, party, wedding, vacation, or other special event to go to and want to look their absolute best (like H and me yesterday when we got pedicures and full sets to get ready for our big trip).
3) Those who have no job, nothing to do and no one to talk to, and just need some time where someone is paying all of their attention to them and they can talk away about everything going on in their lives to this person, regardless of whether the person is fully listening, responding or even completely understanding.
At the salon yesterday, there was a woman who went on and on and on some more to this poor man doing her manicure. There was nothing she didn't tell him about her unexciting life. I felt bad for her, to be honest. I don't mean to be mean about it, it just intrigues me. She just wanted some company and someone to hear her speak.
The same man ended up doing H's full set on her hands and when I got closer to him as I was finished with my nails before H and went to sit next to her, I realized he had wires coming out of the neck of his shirt attached to earbuds that were stuffed into his ears.
He must have turned up the volume when the Talker was at his station. They were barely noticeable, but I sort of found it interesting. Not so much rude, but I can see why someone else might think it was rude. I actually think it's clever... they must get tired of listening to the sound of nail files and lonely drones all day.
Then there were the ladies sitting at the nail dryer station preaching to other ladies who came to sit down with them to dry their nails. I only got part of what they were saying, but I heard the name Jesus, I heard something about "what a blessing," and as H was closer, she said she heard something about how everyone makes some mistakes in life. Then, as the victim was leaving (I think, if I remember correctly, the victim was the woman who spent the last 30 minutes venting to Earbud Man), Preacher Lady made her hug her and then said, "God bless you."
What a day.
1) Those who have been given gift certificates or some amount of money to spend on themselves, and have decided to give themselves a treat; just a little pampering for a day.
2) Those who have a prom, party, wedding, vacation, or other special event to go to and want to look their absolute best (like H and me yesterday when we got pedicures and full sets to get ready for our big trip).
3) Those who have no job, nothing to do and no one to talk to, and just need some time where someone is paying all of their attention to them and they can talk away about everything going on in their lives to this person, regardless of whether the person is fully listening, responding or even completely understanding.
At the salon yesterday, there was a woman who went on and on and on some more to this poor man doing her manicure. There was nothing she didn't tell him about her unexciting life. I felt bad for her, to be honest. I don't mean to be mean about it, it just intrigues me. She just wanted some company and someone to hear her speak.
The same man ended up doing H's full set on her hands and when I got closer to him as I was finished with my nails before H and went to sit next to her, I realized he had wires coming out of the neck of his shirt attached to earbuds that were stuffed into his ears.
He must have turned up the volume when the Talker was at his station. They were barely noticeable, but I sort of found it interesting. Not so much rude, but I can see why someone else might think it was rude. I actually think it's clever... they must get tired of listening to the sound of nail files and lonely drones all day.
Then there were the ladies sitting at the nail dryer station preaching to other ladies who came to sit down with them to dry their nails. I only got part of what they were saying, but I heard the name Jesus, I heard something about "what a blessing," and as H was closer, she said she heard something about how everyone makes some mistakes in life. Then, as the victim was leaving (I think, if I remember correctly, the victim was the woman who spent the last 30 minutes venting to Earbud Man), Preacher Lady made her hug her and then said, "God bless you."
What a day.
Monday, May 2, 2011
Osama bin Laden is DEAD
"And then the man behind the worst terrorist attack on U.S. soil died from an American bullet to his head" (Apuzzo, 2011).
Source:
Apuzzo, Matt. (2011). Inside the raid that killed bin Laden. Associated Press. Retrieved May 3, 2011 from http://xfinity.comcast.net/articles/news-general/20110502/US.Bin.Laden.The.Raid/.
Source:
Apuzzo, Matt. (2011). Inside the raid that killed bin Laden. Associated Press. Retrieved May 3, 2011 from http://xfinity.comcast.net/articles/news-general/20110502/US.Bin.Laden.The.Raid/.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
College
1) Daniel did not get into his top choice school, Northeastern. I don't know if he knows yet. (He doesn't read this blog, trust me.) The e-mail came to our family e-mail which only Rod and I check, and we had to forward it along to him. Luckily, all it says is, Your admission decision has been made, please proceed to such and such a web address and log on using such and such user name and password... Rod read it and told me that he had been declined admission, and we decided just to forward him the e-mail and let him see for himself because there's no good way to tell someone that, right? They should see it for themselves, and unfortunately, Rod had to see it before Daniel, but oh well. So, it is likely that Daniel will be going to Bryant, his second choice. I've gotta find out if they have an Accepted Student's Day so the whole family can maybe go check it out together. We went for a tour and info session back in the summer/fall, but it was just Daniel and me, so it would be good for everyone to go and for us to see it again and ask more questions.
2) Don't remember if I mentioned I applied and was accepted to Endicott College, the Van Loan School of Graduate and Professional Studies for their online Psychology degree. Well, I made the decision to transfer from Ashford to Endicott. I just finished up my last course at Ashford on Monday and will be starting my first class at Endicott in the near future. I'm excited! I decided because Endicott is closer to home, I have been to the campus twice (once when I applied after high school and once with Daniel since he applied, too... hasn't heard back yet) and I think it will look better on my resume.
2) Don't remember if I mentioned I applied and was accepted to Endicott College, the Van Loan School of Graduate and Professional Studies for their online Psychology degree. Well, I made the decision to transfer from Ashford to Endicott. I just finished up my last course at Ashford on Monday and will be starting my first class at Endicott in the near future. I'm excited! I decided because Endicott is closer to home, I have been to the campus twice (once when I applied after high school and once with Daniel since he applied, too... hasn't heard back yet) and I think it will look better on my resume.
On another note...
I just wanted to add, after my last post... Things could be a lot worse, and despite recent ailments previously described, I am very thankful for what I have. The recent traumatic earthquake and tsunami in Japan are just devastating. It's all over the news and on everyone's minds these days, and it's just unbelievable. My thoughts and sympathies go out to all the Japanese people and loved ones of those affected.
Update on anxiety
1) Thank you all who vibed/prayed for me regarding my anxiety! This episode has proved much less debilitating and difficult than the two in the past, so I am extremely thankful. I am doing much better. I have such a great support system and have many skills that I learned in the past to help me through.
2) This post is going to be a rant and explanation of what I have been through, so please skip or skim if you aren't interested or feel it is TMI. I just a) wanted a place to document it for my own records and b) wanted people who are struggling with similar issues to be able to use it as a reference and to know they are not alone, as this is one of the things I have found most helpful.
I will start at the beginning. Early February, my parents went to Cabo San Lucas (Mexico) for a week with my godparents. I noticed I was starting to feel a little anxious at night time without an obvious explanation. I started to think I may have some sort of adult separation anxiety and started researching it a little. It's something I think could be related to my being adopted as an infant, but that's something to discuss more in depth at another time. It wasn't too bad, and I was able to handle it.
Then, a few weeks ago, it started again a bit. I talked to my mom about it and felt that I could handle it. I could talk myself down from small panic attacks that usually happened when I was home alone at night. I practiced my deep breathing, meditating and remembering that my symptoms (racing heartbeat, nervousness) was just adrenaline and that it would have to pass and wouldn't kill me. It always passed within a few minutes (although it felt like hours).
It wasn't until recently when the anxiety began being accompanied by slight depression and more serious physical symptoms that I started feeling like I couldn't handle it as well. Specifically, I was having some fluttering in my chest (palpitations) that I was convinced were serious arrhythmias (after reading an e-mail about female heart attacks) and tightness in my chest (that I later decided was from exercising incorrectly, and from the anxiety itself).
In the past month or so, I have been exercising every day, which is a significant change in lifestyle, as I hadn't been exercising at all on a regular basis for the last seven years. I have been walking at least ten minutes a day and had recently (a few days before these symptoms) been using an exercise ball and doing some strenuous muscle exercises. I was also taking 100mg Zoloft, 500mg Metformin HCL (usually at least 1 daily - sometimes 2 - I am supposed to take 2 but forget often), Isagenix Omega fatty acids capsule (at least 1 daily), and Isagenix multivitamin once a day. I had also taken Provera for 10 days at the beginning of December to bring on a period, and then on March 1st and 2nd I took it, as I'm supposed to take it the first 10 days of every 3rd month. Because of having PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome), I do not ovulate and do not get periods, so this is why I take Metformin and Provera. Anyway, I stopped after March 2nd because that was the day that I had the "major event" and decided Provera was not a good idea at the time. (I ended up having a period anyway after only taking it two of the ten days... hmm.)
So, on March 2nd, I was talking to my mom on the phone about how I had been having this tightness in my chest and fluttering, both when I was exercising and then once or twice when I was just sitting still, supposedly relaxed. I couldn't stop worrying about if something was really wrong with my heart. My mom assured me it was just my anxiety and that lots of people with anxiety disorders believe they are having heart attacks and end up in the ER with only symptoms of their anxiety. (She's a clinical social worker with a private practice doing psychotherapy.) After talking for a while, she recognized that I wouldn't feel much better until I got checked out by a medical doctor, so she offered for me to drive over to her house and we would go to the clinic nearby.
I had gone to that same clinic a couple months earlier when Daniel thought he'd broken his pinky playing basketball at the Y, and we were in and out really quick, so I assumed that even though we were going at 10 o'clock on a Wednesday night, we probably would make it home before 11 and maybe even beat my dad back from his meeting. (FYI, Rod was working that night, so I didn't ask him to help out with all this, which he later explained upset him because he wanted to be involved and needed.) Well, we ended up staying at the clinic until 1:30am... on my birthday... My wonderful mother was a good sport and very helpful to me.
After an EKG, hours of observation, blood tests and x-rays, it was determined that there was absolutely nothing immediately wrong with me and that it was probably just the anxiety and strain from exercising. They did offer to admit me to the hospital for further testing if I was still worried, but that it probably wasn't necessary. I said no thank you and we went home and went to sleep.
The next day, I went to work and shortly after I got there, could not control my emotions. I was all waterworks. I had called my psychiatric APRN to talk about doing something different with my Zoloft in case that was the problem (although it had always worked great for me), and she called me back at work and as soon as I heard her voice, I started hysterically crying. I had to go outside and my boss eventually came out of her appointment and got on the phone (her in the office, me in my car) and asked what was going on. I told her I'd be right in and she calmed me down and made me a cup of calming tea, which I only took one sip of because I don't like the taste of tea. I was able to continue working until about one o'clock when I had made an appointment to see my APRN. Rod came and ate lunch with me before that, which was sweet. It was partially because it was my birthday, and partially because he was worried about me and I wanted to see him. A drug rep brought my favorite Greek salad and some desserts, which I graciously shared with him because I didn't have much of an appetite (although more than previous episodes).
At my appointment with my APRN, we decided to switch me from Zoloft to Lexapro because it might have less of a weight gaining (or weight-loss-preventing) affect.* I have since titrated the Zoloft completely and have replaced the 100mg of Zoloft with 10mg of Lexapro and it seems to be working just as well. Only side effects with that were tiny headaches toward the end of the day, but they seem to be going away.
A couple days later, I had an appointment with my general practitioner who I really like; he's great. I also made an appointment with a psychotherapist here in town. I met her the other day, she's great, too. So far, so good. She's interested in the fact that I was adopted, as well. I've only had one session so far but have my next one on Monday. I was lucky to find a good one on the first try... in my experience, this doesn't always happen and you have to be picky.
I also had an appointment with my gynecologist to make sure there aren't any drug interactions with the things I'm on. I also talked about the Provera and told her I'd stopped it after the 2nd day this cycle because I was so over-emotional and felt either the Provera was causing this or that it was at the very least adding to it, and she agreed. She prescribed a different, related med for the next cycle which will be in June. Around that time I may actually decide to switch to Chlomid to make myself ovulate so we can start trying to get pregnant. :) But that depends on how things are going with me. I also talked to her about this, about my concerns that pregnancy will not be a good idea for me with anxiety and dependency and she explained that it could or it could not, you just never know. I also explained my concerns about not being on the Lipitor that my GP had prescribed to me and she took me off of because it's "devastating" to be on if you should become pregnant, and she said that even though my cholesterol levels have come up again now that I have been off of the Lipitor, that it won't be bad for me to not take it for a few years until I am done being pregnant. So that was good news.
My therapist also told me that in her experience, all women she's known with anxiety disorders who have become pregnant, have had no problem and actually have gotten BETTER during the time they were pregnant, maybe due to the hormones or due to the fact that their focus is elsewhere. This was good news.
Again, I sometimes wonder if it's selfish to become pregnant when I am thinking about myself and my issues, and also selfish to pass on my mental illness history to children, along with Rod's history of addiction (family members, not him). But in talking with my therapist, I realize that this shouldn't stop us from having babies, that everyone passes along something to their children and with our knowledge and experience, we can help and support our children should they ever face what we have been through. And Rod has never had a sip of alcohol (except in church communion) and can pass along his judgment to our children on this, too. It's not inevitable that our children will suffer from these struggles we might pass on.
* Speaking of weight, today is Wednesday, my weigh-in day, and unfortunately I have gained a pound this week! Better luck next week... gotta get back on track here. Trying to remind myself not to push myself too hard, though, because losing too much too fast will probably have adverse effects on my body and I definitely don't need that right now.
Did I mention I also have poison ivy now? The same night I went to the ER, Rod had an "exposure" to scabies, of all things. He was wrestling a kid and his mother, and the mother announced that she was pregnant and had scabies. We took all the general precautions and Rod got the cream and prevented as best he could, but of course when I woke up the other day with little bumps on my inner elbow, I was like, "You've got to be kidding me!" We went to the doctor who said it didn't look like scabies and probably wasn't because of how careful Rod was and we didn't even have contact with each other between the time he was exposed and the time he took a shower and put the cream on. But he prescribed me the cream, too, just as a precaution. Not fun. But now I definitely think it's poison ivy or poison something (oak or sumac) because it looks like it and it is spreading that way, and doesn't look like what scabies rashes generally look like (from what I've seen on the internet). Anyway, just lovely, huh?
"Happy birthday sweetie, here are some scabies to go along with your anxiety!"
2) This post is going to be a rant and explanation of what I have been through, so please skip or skim if you aren't interested or feel it is TMI. I just a) wanted a place to document it for my own records and b) wanted people who are struggling with similar issues to be able to use it as a reference and to know they are not alone, as this is one of the things I have found most helpful.
I will start at the beginning. Early February, my parents went to Cabo San Lucas (Mexico) for a week with my godparents. I noticed I was starting to feel a little anxious at night time without an obvious explanation. I started to think I may have some sort of adult separation anxiety and started researching it a little. It's something I think could be related to my being adopted as an infant, but that's something to discuss more in depth at another time. It wasn't too bad, and I was able to handle it.
Then, a few weeks ago, it started again a bit. I talked to my mom about it and felt that I could handle it. I could talk myself down from small panic attacks that usually happened when I was home alone at night. I practiced my deep breathing, meditating and remembering that my symptoms (racing heartbeat, nervousness) was just adrenaline and that it would have to pass and wouldn't kill me. It always passed within a few minutes (although it felt like hours).
It wasn't until recently when the anxiety began being accompanied by slight depression and more serious physical symptoms that I started feeling like I couldn't handle it as well. Specifically, I was having some fluttering in my chest (palpitations) that I was convinced were serious arrhythmias (after reading an e-mail about female heart attacks) and tightness in my chest (that I later decided was from exercising incorrectly, and from the anxiety itself).
In the past month or so, I have been exercising every day, which is a significant change in lifestyle, as I hadn't been exercising at all on a regular basis for the last seven years. I have been walking at least ten minutes a day and had recently (a few days before these symptoms) been using an exercise ball and doing some strenuous muscle exercises. I was also taking 100mg Zoloft, 500mg Metformin HCL (usually at least 1 daily - sometimes 2 - I am supposed to take 2 but forget often), Isagenix Omega fatty acids capsule (at least 1 daily), and Isagenix multivitamin once a day. I had also taken Provera for 10 days at the beginning of December to bring on a period, and then on March 1st and 2nd I took it, as I'm supposed to take it the first 10 days of every 3rd month. Because of having PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome), I do not ovulate and do not get periods, so this is why I take Metformin and Provera. Anyway, I stopped after March 2nd because that was the day that I had the "major event" and decided Provera was not a good idea at the time. (I ended up having a period anyway after only taking it two of the ten days... hmm.)
So, on March 2nd, I was talking to my mom on the phone about how I had been having this tightness in my chest and fluttering, both when I was exercising and then once or twice when I was just sitting still, supposedly relaxed. I couldn't stop worrying about if something was really wrong with my heart. My mom assured me it was just my anxiety and that lots of people with anxiety disorders believe they are having heart attacks and end up in the ER with only symptoms of their anxiety. (She's a clinical social worker with a private practice doing psychotherapy.) After talking for a while, she recognized that I wouldn't feel much better until I got checked out by a medical doctor, so she offered for me to drive over to her house and we would go to the clinic nearby.
I had gone to that same clinic a couple months earlier when Daniel thought he'd broken his pinky playing basketball at the Y, and we were in and out really quick, so I assumed that even though we were going at 10 o'clock on a Wednesday night, we probably would make it home before 11 and maybe even beat my dad back from his meeting. (FYI, Rod was working that night, so I didn't ask him to help out with all this, which he later explained upset him because he wanted to be involved and needed.) Well, we ended up staying at the clinic until 1:30am... on my birthday... My wonderful mother was a good sport and very helpful to me.
After an EKG, hours of observation, blood tests and x-rays, it was determined that there was absolutely nothing immediately wrong with me and that it was probably just the anxiety and strain from exercising. They did offer to admit me to the hospital for further testing if I was still worried, but that it probably wasn't necessary. I said no thank you and we went home and went to sleep.
The next day, I went to work and shortly after I got there, could not control my emotions. I was all waterworks. I had called my psychiatric APRN to talk about doing something different with my Zoloft in case that was the problem (although it had always worked great for me), and she called me back at work and as soon as I heard her voice, I started hysterically crying. I had to go outside and my boss eventually came out of her appointment and got on the phone (her in the office, me in my car) and asked what was going on. I told her I'd be right in and she calmed me down and made me a cup of calming tea, which I only took one sip of because I don't like the taste of tea. I was able to continue working until about one o'clock when I had made an appointment to see my APRN. Rod came and ate lunch with me before that, which was sweet. It was partially because it was my birthday, and partially because he was worried about me and I wanted to see him. A drug rep brought my favorite Greek salad and some desserts, which I graciously shared with him because I didn't have much of an appetite (although more than previous episodes).
At my appointment with my APRN, we decided to switch me from Zoloft to Lexapro because it might have less of a weight gaining (or weight-loss-preventing) affect.* I have since titrated the Zoloft completely and have replaced the 100mg of Zoloft with 10mg of Lexapro and it seems to be working just as well. Only side effects with that were tiny headaches toward the end of the day, but they seem to be going away.
A couple days later, I had an appointment with my general practitioner who I really like; he's great. I also made an appointment with a psychotherapist here in town. I met her the other day, she's great, too. So far, so good. She's interested in the fact that I was adopted, as well. I've only had one session so far but have my next one on Monday. I was lucky to find a good one on the first try... in my experience, this doesn't always happen and you have to be picky.
I also had an appointment with my gynecologist to make sure there aren't any drug interactions with the things I'm on. I also talked about the Provera and told her I'd stopped it after the 2nd day this cycle because I was so over-emotional and felt either the Provera was causing this or that it was at the very least adding to it, and she agreed. She prescribed a different, related med for the next cycle which will be in June. Around that time I may actually decide to switch to Chlomid to make myself ovulate so we can start trying to get pregnant. :) But that depends on how things are going with me. I also talked to her about this, about my concerns that pregnancy will not be a good idea for me with anxiety and dependency and she explained that it could or it could not, you just never know. I also explained my concerns about not being on the Lipitor that my GP had prescribed to me and she took me off of because it's "devastating" to be on if you should become pregnant, and she said that even though my cholesterol levels have come up again now that I have been off of the Lipitor, that it won't be bad for me to not take it for a few years until I am done being pregnant. So that was good news.
My therapist also told me that in her experience, all women she's known with anxiety disorders who have become pregnant, have had no problem and actually have gotten BETTER during the time they were pregnant, maybe due to the hormones or due to the fact that their focus is elsewhere. This was good news.
Again, I sometimes wonder if it's selfish to become pregnant when I am thinking about myself and my issues, and also selfish to pass on my mental illness history to children, along with Rod's history of addiction (family members, not him). But in talking with my therapist, I realize that this shouldn't stop us from having babies, that everyone passes along something to their children and with our knowledge and experience, we can help and support our children should they ever face what we have been through. And Rod has never had a sip of alcohol (except in church communion) and can pass along his judgment to our children on this, too. It's not inevitable that our children will suffer from these struggles we might pass on.
* Speaking of weight, today is Wednesday, my weigh-in day, and unfortunately I have gained a pound this week! Better luck next week... gotta get back on track here. Trying to remind myself not to push myself too hard, though, because losing too much too fast will probably have adverse effects on my body and I definitely don't need that right now.
Did I mention I also have poison ivy now? The same night I went to the ER, Rod had an "exposure" to scabies, of all things. He was wrestling a kid and his mother, and the mother announced that she was pregnant and had scabies. We took all the general precautions and Rod got the cream and prevented as best he could, but of course when I woke up the other day with little bumps on my inner elbow, I was like, "You've got to be kidding me!" We went to the doctor who said it didn't look like scabies and probably wasn't because of how careful Rod was and we didn't even have contact with each other between the time he was exposed and the time he took a shower and put the cream on. But he prescribed me the cream, too, just as a precaution. Not fun. But now I definitely think it's poison ivy or poison something (oak or sumac) because it looks like it and it is spreading that way, and doesn't look like what scabies rashes generally look like (from what I've seen on the internet). Anyway, just lovely, huh?
"Happy birthday sweetie, here are some scabies to go along with your anxiety!"
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Episode #3
I haven't posted in a little while because I've been struggling *again* with this stupid anxiety disorder. I hate to use the word 'remission', but I suppose that's what I've been going through since a few years ago when Episode #2 subsided. This would be Episode #3, and - knock on wood - has not seemed quite as bad as Episodes #1 and 2. I don't really want to get into much of it now because I'm trying NOT to think about it more than I already have been, but I will write more about it later.
For now, I want to post something from an e-mail newsletter I got today regarding the Ministry of Women, Children and Youth Affairs in Ethiopia's intent to reduce the number of intercountry adoptions by 90%. If you want to sign the petition asking that the Ministry consider alternate options, please click here.
I don't exactly know how I feel about this, though. I would think they would only do this for good reasons. According to the e-mail I got, the two main reasons they are planning to reduce intercountry adoptions is because 1) There is a lot of corruption in intercountry adoption and 2) they want to focus their financial efforts on children and families in-country. This makes a lot of sense to me, and I do think that it is important to focus more on keeping children and families together and in their country of origin, and also to weed out the bad agencies and individuals who are putting a bad name and face on international adoption... BUT, at the same time, there are so so many orphans in institutions throughout the country, and on the streets, and this will leave them there and ultimately have horrible consequences on their lives. I mean, we'll see I guess... again, if this is a true consideration of the Ministry, they must have good reason to believe that this will be better for children and families than intercountry adoption... and hopefully they do whatever is best.
Either way, signing the petition can't hurt... all it means is that we are hoping they will look into other options to prevent corruption and to spread out the money more evenly because intercountry adoption really can be the best thing for many of these children, and stopping these adoptions by 90% is dramatic.
Anyway, read more about it if you wish. It shocked me, needless to say.
For now, I want to post something from an e-mail newsletter I got today regarding the Ministry of Women, Children and Youth Affairs in Ethiopia's intent to reduce the number of intercountry adoptions by 90%. If you want to sign the petition asking that the Ministry consider alternate options, please click here.
I don't exactly know how I feel about this, though. I would think they would only do this for good reasons. According to the e-mail I got, the two main reasons they are planning to reduce intercountry adoptions is because 1) There is a lot of corruption in intercountry adoption and 2) they want to focus their financial efforts on children and families in-country. This makes a lot of sense to me, and I do think that it is important to focus more on keeping children and families together and in their country of origin, and also to weed out the bad agencies and individuals who are putting a bad name and face on international adoption... BUT, at the same time, there are so so many orphans in institutions throughout the country, and on the streets, and this will leave them there and ultimately have horrible consequences on their lives. I mean, we'll see I guess... again, if this is a true consideration of the Ministry, they must have good reason to believe that this will be better for children and families than intercountry adoption... and hopefully they do whatever is best.
Either way, signing the petition can't hurt... all it means is that we are hoping they will look into other options to prevent corruption and to spread out the money more evenly because intercountry adoption really can be the best thing for many of these children, and stopping these adoptions by 90% is dramatic.
Anyway, read more about it if you wish. It shocked me, needless to say.
Friday, February 25, 2011
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Buying locally, organically
I think I've probably talked about this in previous post(s), but I want to stress how strongly I feel about buying locally. Connecticut is so fortunate to have CT Farm Fresh Express.
CTFFE allows you to choose and order the food you want from their website, they pick it up from farms around the state, and deliver it to your door weekly. No membership or minimum fee required, and everything is made locally so energy costs are cut and we are supporting our local economy!
There are many other reasons, as well, which you can find on the "Why Local" section of their site.
One thing my friend Kaley has educated me on is Raw Milk. I know I must have mentioned this in the past because it's something I advocate for, but hardly ever talk to anyone about because it's not a widely accepted practice. Many people don't realize that raw milk is actually much better for you than pasteurized & homogenized milk, when from the right farm. See Real Milk site for answers to all questions and an endless source of information. I haven't bought pasteurized/homogenized milk since, except for a few times in a pinch when I needed to get it that second and even then, I bought Farmer's Cow (from Connecticut) at Stop & Shop.
I recommend everyone educate themselves -- obviously make the decision that is right for you and your family, and always question (and even visit) the farms you get your milk from to see how they treat their cows, how the cows are fed and what sanitary measures they take.
I also recommend everyone do a Google search for their own state's version of CTFFE. Even if you have to start one yourself or just shop the local farmer's markets for a while, it's worth the trouble when you'd rather just cross the street from your house and buy your groceries from your grocery store chain. You'll thank me later! :)
CTFFE allows you to choose and order the food you want from their website, they pick it up from farms around the state, and deliver it to your door weekly. No membership or minimum fee required, and everything is made locally so energy costs are cut and we are supporting our local economy!
There are many other reasons, as well, which you can find on the "Why Local" section of their site.
One thing my friend Kaley has educated me on is Raw Milk. I know I must have mentioned this in the past because it's something I advocate for, but hardly ever talk to anyone about because it's not a widely accepted practice. Many people don't realize that raw milk is actually much better for you than pasteurized & homogenized milk, when from the right farm. See Real Milk site for answers to all questions and an endless source of information. I haven't bought pasteurized/homogenized milk since, except for a few times in a pinch when I needed to get it that second and even then, I bought Farmer's Cow (from Connecticut) at Stop & Shop.
I recommend everyone educate themselves -- obviously make the decision that is right for you and your family, and always question (and even visit) the farms you get your milk from to see how they treat their cows, how the cows are fed and what sanitary measures they take.
I also recommend everyone do a Google search for their own state's version of CTFFE. Even if you have to start one yourself or just shop the local farmer's markets for a while, it's worth the trouble when you'd rather just cross the street from your house and buy your groceries from your grocery store chain. You'll thank me later! :)
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Endicott!
When I was applying to colleges out of high school, I applied to 10 and got into 8. Endicott was one of the colleges I was accepted to, and was high on my list but decided to go to Eckerd instead. I went to visit Endicott with Daniel a few months ago (he applied also but doesn't really have much interest in going there, I don't think) and fell in love with it. Not only that, but I found out they have an online Psychology degree! So, I started thinking about transferring because Endicott feels better to me than Ashford. Ashford is fine... and I chose it because it has a physical campus as well as having online degrees... but, really, it is mainly known as an online university. Endicott is mainly known as a private campus college.
So, I applied, just to see if I could get in again. Tonight, my mom called me saying that there was a big packet from Endicott at their house addressed to me. Not sure why, since I'm sure I gave them my address, but obviously because I'd applied in the past they sent it to the address I lived at then.
Anyway, to the news... I GOT IN! I asked my mom to open it while we were on the phone together and she started reading the, "We are pleased to inform you..." (or something similar). Now, I'm trying not to get too excited because I don't know how many of my 80+ credits will transfer. If fewer than 70 transfer, I doubt I'll do it because I don't want to have wasted that money spent on those courses that won't transfer. So, crossing my fingers and we'll see!
It'd be nice to just go to Massachusetts for graduation instead of Clinton, Iowa. :p Rod will stay at Ashford, but he refuses to go participate in his graduation so I decided I'd just throw him a graduation party and get him a gown and hat when the time comes. But I'd like to go to my graduation, I think.
So, please send vibes that my credits transfer!!! I'd love to be an Endicott alum. :)
So, I applied, just to see if I could get in again. Tonight, my mom called me saying that there was a big packet from Endicott at their house addressed to me. Not sure why, since I'm sure I gave them my address, but obviously because I'd applied in the past they sent it to the address I lived at then.
Anyway, to the news... I GOT IN! I asked my mom to open it while we were on the phone together and she started reading the, "We are pleased to inform you..." (or something similar). Now, I'm trying not to get too excited because I don't know how many of my 80+ credits will transfer. If fewer than 70 transfer, I doubt I'll do it because I don't want to have wasted that money spent on those courses that won't transfer. So, crossing my fingers and we'll see!
It'd be nice to just go to Massachusetts for graduation instead of Clinton, Iowa. :p Rod will stay at Ashford, but he refuses to go participate in his graduation so I decided I'd just throw him a graduation party and get him a gown and hat when the time comes. But I'd like to go to my graduation, I think.
So, please send vibes that my credits transfer!!! I'd love to be an Endicott alum. :)
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Dreams of fostering
Last night I had a vivid dream that Rod was becoming very interested in foster care. We were sitting in the living room and the phone rang. He answered the phone and it was a social worker in Connecticut offering to provide us some information on a little boy named Dawit (an Ethiopian name, not sure why the foster child here in the U.S. would have the name, but who knows? Probably because I was reading a Yahoo! groups post about a family with an Ethiopian adopted child with this name). He was about three or four and Rod was extremely interested in fostering him. I woke up to Rod coming home from work and getting into bed, and I had a sinking feeling you often get when you wake up from a dream you wish was reality. I didn't know I was that interested in foster care myself! I know it's what Rod would prefer if we can't conceive... at least, that's what he told me a couple of years ago, and his mind changes constantly.
We'll see.
WHFC Sponsorship
Today we received a packet from Wide Horizons with information on the child and family we just started to sponsor this month. He is a 10-year-old boy living in Kebado, in the Sidama region of Ethiopia. We will call him "MB".
The area of Ethiopia where MB lives is lush and fertile, but unfortunately, agricultural infrastructure is poor so only the wealthy are able to have large harvests. Many of the families that are sponsored by WHFC are encouraged to start small businesses such as "rearing livestock, owning small shops, mule transportation, honey bee hives, craft making, making and selling tea, and photography to name a few." (letter I received about the Family Empowerment Program)
Most of the families starting entrepreneurhip - like MB's family - have only completed the initial steps and need support and advice on how to save funds and handle the startup process. As of exactly a year ago, MB's family was receiving counseling and was starting to spend more money on daily consumption. The family has only saved up 80 Birr so far, which is less than $5 U.S.
MB's family's targeted business is bicycle rental, rearing animals, retailing local drink in their home, and their monthly income generated is 300 Birr, or just under $18 U.S. Their business was initiated in September of 2008. The challenges they have faced in the past was little or no customers, but they are fortunate enough to have their own house that they can use to run their business out of.
As of last year, the estimated time for the family to reach self-sufficiency was two years.
Both of MB's parents have died of chronic disease. He lives with his grandmother, aunt, cousins and siblings. Thankfully, he is in good physical condition and is currently healthy. He likes to play football and ride a bike. His daily activities include cleaning the house, looking after cattle and helping his family.
This information was sent to me in the packet from the past two years of sponsorship. They update annually. According to the 2009 update, MB's previous sponsors didn't correspond with him. Not cool!
I am going to write to him often, and hopefully visit him and his family one day!
I'm hoping another update will come shortly, since it has been a year since that last annual update.
If you are interested in child sponsorship or any other type of humanitarian aid, you should definitely check out Wide Horizons for Children. They are reputable and experienced and have some great programs, not just sponsorship and not just in Ethiopia. Check them out here.
The area of Ethiopia where MB lives is lush and fertile, but unfortunately, agricultural infrastructure is poor so only the wealthy are able to have large harvests. Many of the families that are sponsored by WHFC are encouraged to start small businesses such as "rearing livestock, owning small shops, mule transportation, honey bee hives, craft making, making and selling tea, and photography to name a few." (letter I received about the Family Empowerment Program)
Most of the families starting entrepreneurhip - like MB's family - have only completed the initial steps and need support and advice on how to save funds and handle the startup process. As of exactly a year ago, MB's family was receiving counseling and was starting to spend more money on daily consumption. The family has only saved up 80 Birr so far, which is less than $5 U.S.
MB's family's targeted business is bicycle rental, rearing animals, retailing local drink in their home, and their monthly income generated is 300 Birr, or just under $18 U.S. Their business was initiated in September of 2008. The challenges they have faced in the past was little or no customers, but they are fortunate enough to have their own house that they can use to run their business out of.
As of last year, the estimated time for the family to reach self-sufficiency was two years.
Both of MB's parents have died of chronic disease. He lives with his grandmother, aunt, cousins and siblings. Thankfully, he is in good physical condition and is currently healthy. He likes to play football and ride a bike. His daily activities include cleaning the house, looking after cattle and helping his family.
This information was sent to me in the packet from the past two years of sponsorship. They update annually. According to the 2009 update, MB's previous sponsors didn't correspond with him. Not cool!
I am going to write to him often, and hopefully visit him and his family one day!
I'm hoping another update will come shortly, since it has been a year since that last annual update.
If you are interested in child sponsorship or any other type of humanitarian aid, you should definitely check out Wide Horizons for Children. They are reputable and experienced and have some great programs, not just sponsorship and not just in Ethiopia. Check them out here.
Friday, February 11, 2011
Quitters!
The same day I decided to take on this personal weight loss challenge, I found out that my father-in-law Dan has decided to quit smoking. He went to his doctor and his doctor told him that if he didn't quit right now, he was going to die. He has already had two heart attacks in the last 10 years, one of which was only a couple of months ago. At this appointment a couple days ago, the doctor asked if he was having any angina pains, to which he answered yes, slightly (although he told me he was fibbing, he was actually having worse pains than he admitted). So the doctor asked him how badly he wanted to live. And that did it, apparently.
I'm so excited for him! And proud. Now, he's tried to quit in the past... but, hey, I've tried to quit eating badly in the past too, and we both failed on our attempts, so maybe this time will be different. He did mention he wants to be around to see his grandkids. :) We really, really want that, too.
I have been doing pretty well the last couple of days. I shopped and got a bunch of healthy snacks, I've been eating oranges and goldfish -- which I realize isn't necessarily a super healthy snack, but it's better than McDonalds french fries or frozen pizza, that's for sure!
Today I ate some spaghetti and meatballs, which I really should cut back on. I didn't eat as much as I usually would have, but it was still too much. Again, I'm trying to aim for 1000-1500 calories a day, and I think today I was probably a little over that. I had a lot of carbs. BUT, again, it wasn't fast food or super fatty stuff.
The other thing I have yet to do is exercise. I haven't in the past two days and I really need to do that every day. Maybe I'll force myself tonight. It helps when I use my stepper and watch TV at the same time... that is, it helps me exercise for longer before I get totally bored and quit... it helps to distract myself and time goes by faster.
I'm hosting the whole family Sunday night for dinner (except Daniel who has to work and maybe Dan who said he might be too cranky from his nicotine withdrawal to have to come to dinner and be all jolly--we told him we didn't care and to re-think and come). It's kind of going to be a pre-Valentine's Day celebration dinner, I guess. I have to think of what to make! Something Valentine's Day themed, if possible...my mom's bringing dessert so that leaves me in a pickle with how to make a main course Valentine's-themed. We'll see!
I'm so excited for him! And proud. Now, he's tried to quit in the past... but, hey, I've tried to quit eating badly in the past too, and we both failed on our attempts, so maybe this time will be different. He did mention he wants to be around to see his grandkids. :) We really, really want that, too.
I have been doing pretty well the last couple of days. I shopped and got a bunch of healthy snacks, I've been eating oranges and goldfish -- which I realize isn't necessarily a super healthy snack, but it's better than McDonalds french fries or frozen pizza, that's for sure!
Today I ate some spaghetti and meatballs, which I really should cut back on. I didn't eat as much as I usually would have, but it was still too much. Again, I'm trying to aim for 1000-1500 calories a day, and I think today I was probably a little over that. I had a lot of carbs. BUT, again, it wasn't fast food or super fatty stuff.
The other thing I have yet to do is exercise. I haven't in the past two days and I really need to do that every day. Maybe I'll force myself tonight. It helps when I use my stepper and watch TV at the same time... that is, it helps me exercise for longer before I get totally bored and quit... it helps to distract myself and time goes by faster.
I'm hosting the whole family Sunday night for dinner (except Daniel who has to work and maybe Dan who said he might be too cranky from his nicotine withdrawal to have to come to dinner and be all jolly--we told him we didn't care and to re-think and come). It's kind of going to be a pre-Valentine's Day celebration dinner, I guess. I have to think of what to make! Something Valentine's Day themed, if possible...my mom's bringing dessert so that leaves me in a pickle with how to make a main course Valentine's-themed. We'll see!
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Monday, February 7, 2011
Bahamas, here we come!
Soon (within the next 6 months), we will be sitting in those chairs!
Our best friends (we'll call them Hailey and Warren) and we are going to be going to Sandals Royal Bahamian in the Bahamas. We just booked the vacation last week. We're all very excited, especially with the huge amounts of snow, ice and rain we've gotten recently... it will be a great change of scenery. :)
Source of all above pics: http://www.sandals.com
I would have slightly preferred a vacation with a little more culture and change from the typical, tropical vacations that are the only times I've ever been out of the country, but Hailey and Warren aren't big on vacations that aren't all-inclusive and Americanized. (Hailey's afraid of wildlife and crimes, and Warren's afraid of the outdoors, haha.) I had suggested Belize, which is both tropical AND cultural (Mayan ruins, etc.), but they didn't have any big resorts that were what we were looking for exactly. Hailey and Warren like the brand name of Sandals because they went to one in Jamaica for their honeymoon and they know what to expect. Rod wasn't complaining because all-inclusive means all you can eat - for one set price!
And, at the end of the day, we're not too picky - we just want to go on vacation with them. We can take plenty of cultural vacations in the future. Maybe in a couple years we can convince them to try Belize or Australia or something... that'd be the next step up, I think. ;)
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Annie and Rod Capps
Wow, so who knew there was a musical couple named Annie and Rod Capps? How funny!
http://www.maynardmusic.com/bio.html
http://www.maynardmusic.com/bio.html
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
SNOW! And more SNOW!
So back in November I posted about how I'm glad we don't live in California.
I think I spoke too soon. You would not believe how much snow we have gotten so far this winter! I think I've been to work one day in the last few weeks. We've had four feet of snow and today, we had several inches of ICE from rain and sleet. It's been terrible. I think it is just now starting to subside... knock on wood...
Anyway, I thought that was funny because the other day I jokingly mentioned we should just move to California. Oops!
I love the snow, I always have... it's just a pain to shovel, plow, slip, drive on ice, and worry about icicles falling from the roof onto your head when you walk out the front door... eek!
I think I spoke too soon. You would not believe how much snow we have gotten so far this winter! I think I've been to work one day in the last few weeks. We've had four feet of snow and today, we had several inches of ICE from rain and sleet. It's been terrible. I think it is just now starting to subside... knock on wood...
Anyway, I thought that was funny because the other day I jokingly mentioned we should just move to California. Oops!
I love the snow, I always have... it's just a pain to shovel, plow, slip, drive on ice, and worry about icicles falling from the roof onto your head when you walk out the front door... eek!
Our driveway:
Driving into work:
Driving into work:
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Holding off
Today marks the day we agreed to "officially" start trying to expand our family. I don't think I'm quite ready. It's hard to believe I'm typing these words...
Am I ready to be a mom? Heck yeah! I've been ready since I was ten years old, it feels like. Am I ready physically? Nope. I'm still very much overweight, and Rod keeps telling me this doesn't matter because obese women give birth all the time and everything's fine. But it's not fine. It creates risks for both mother and baby, and I want to be healthy so I grow a healthy baby and can deliver him or her safely and as easily as possible.
Not only that, but my reproductive system still isn't working. I've been on these new drugs for a couple months now - the Provera and Metformin. The Provera I took the first 10 days of December and had a period, and then had another period in January without taking the Provera (you're only supposed to take it every 3 months to bring on a period). I was excited at first thinking, maybe the one cycle of Provera did it - maybe it jump-started my cycles back to normal! But alas, I haven't gotten a period since. I keep forgetting to take the Metformin. It's not like the Zoloft where if I don't take it, within 6-12 hours later I have a terrible, "dizzy" headache. I can't tell a difference whether I take the Metformin or not. It's supposed to help with insulin resistance, which is probably from my obesity and causes the offset of my menstrual cycles.
I have a few more months before I go back to the OB/GYN. I'm going to exercise and diet until then (I hope), try to get on a better schedule with the Metformin and if I don't ovulate between now and my appointment, I will talk to her about other options (Clomid, probably) and probably get an SA for Rod just to be sure there's no problem there.
To be honest, I want to adopt. This is not to say that I don't want to have biological children, too. I would love to grow a person inside me and experience pregnancy, and bring something into the world that is genetically the love of my life and me combined. But it's not as important to me as just having a family and raising a child, and there are so many children that are in need around the world already. Why not bring one of them into our family? Unfortunately, Rod doesn't share this same desire. Although he agrees to adopt in the future, he wants to try biologically first.
His main reason for the order of biological first, adoption second? He's afraid of being a bad dad. He's afraid he won't do it right, and that with a biological child, he feels more comfortable with the chance of messing it up than with a child that we adopted. He has a hard time explaining it better than that. I try to reassure him that I married him because I know he's going to be a great dad. I see it in him. He's a different person than his dad. He's not going to disappear, he's going to be a big part of his childrens' lives, forever, no matter what. We have a different family, and he is a mature, responsible and loving man. But I suppose what he's feeling is normal.
With Clomid, if I am remembering correctly, you can only take it for 6 months, no longer. After that, it's either more serious interventions or letting God and patience control whether we ever get pregnant, and begin expanding our family with adoption. We are both happy with this scenario and waiting until that step presents itself to make the decision.
Rod hates that I think ahead like this and seem pessimistic. But I know my body and I know nothing is happening, and it's been two and a half years since we stopped 'preventing'. In other words, we haven't been trying, but if I was working correctly, I would most likely have gotten pregnant already. I also know from others I am close to who have been through infertility, so I am familiar with how the process typically works. So, I like to think that I am prepared.
Am I ready to be a mom? Heck yeah! I've been ready since I was ten years old, it feels like. Am I ready physically? Nope. I'm still very much overweight, and Rod keeps telling me this doesn't matter because obese women give birth all the time and everything's fine. But it's not fine. It creates risks for both mother and baby, and I want to be healthy so I grow a healthy baby and can deliver him or her safely and as easily as possible.
Not only that, but my reproductive system still isn't working. I've been on these new drugs for a couple months now - the Provera and Metformin. The Provera I took the first 10 days of December and had a period, and then had another period in January without taking the Provera (you're only supposed to take it every 3 months to bring on a period). I was excited at first thinking, maybe the one cycle of Provera did it - maybe it jump-started my cycles back to normal! But alas, I haven't gotten a period since. I keep forgetting to take the Metformin. It's not like the Zoloft where if I don't take it, within 6-12 hours later I have a terrible, "dizzy" headache. I can't tell a difference whether I take the Metformin or not. It's supposed to help with insulin resistance, which is probably from my obesity and causes the offset of my menstrual cycles.
I have a few more months before I go back to the OB/GYN. I'm going to exercise and diet until then (I hope), try to get on a better schedule with the Metformin and if I don't ovulate between now and my appointment, I will talk to her about other options (Clomid, probably) and probably get an SA for Rod just to be sure there's no problem there.
To be honest, I want to adopt. This is not to say that I don't want to have biological children, too. I would love to grow a person inside me and experience pregnancy, and bring something into the world that is genetically the love of my life and me combined. But it's not as important to me as just having a family and raising a child, and there are so many children that are in need around the world already. Why not bring one of them into our family? Unfortunately, Rod doesn't share this same desire. Although he agrees to adopt in the future, he wants to try biologically first.
His main reason for the order of biological first, adoption second? He's afraid of being a bad dad. He's afraid he won't do it right, and that with a biological child, he feels more comfortable with the chance of messing it up than with a child that we adopted. He has a hard time explaining it better than that. I try to reassure him that I married him because I know he's going to be a great dad. I see it in him. He's a different person than his dad. He's not going to disappear, he's going to be a big part of his childrens' lives, forever, no matter what. We have a different family, and he is a mature, responsible and loving man. But I suppose what he's feeling is normal.
With Clomid, if I am remembering correctly, you can only take it for 6 months, no longer. After that, it's either more serious interventions or letting God and patience control whether we ever get pregnant, and begin expanding our family with adoption. We are both happy with this scenario and waiting until that step presents itself to make the decision.
Rod hates that I think ahead like this and seem pessimistic. But I know my body and I know nothing is happening, and it's been two and a half years since we stopped 'preventing'. In other words, we haven't been trying, but if I was working correctly, I would most likely have gotten pregnant already. I also know from others I am close to who have been through infertility, so I am familiar with how the process typically works. So, I like to think that I am prepared.
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